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Review: ‘An astronaut’s guide to life on Earth’

Chris Hadfield’s account of his astronaut life is a must-read for those looking to be (literally) transported to another world.
by The Editors | editor@themetrognome.in

Growing up, a lot of us dream of being astronauts, just like we also dream of being actors, entertainers, doctors and truckers. Growing up, any job that lets us play with toys and props is cool.

Famous astronaut Chris Hadfield, however, held on to his childhood dream of being an astronaut close to his heart. In his book, An Astronaut’s Guide To Life On Earth, the former astronaut and one of the world’s most accomplished persons in his field, describes how he first dreamed of becoming an astronaut at age 9 while living in his native home town in Ontario, Canada. But like most other children who grow up and relinquish their childhood dreams for more realistic pursuits, Hadfield saw his dream through to a hugely successful, trail-blazing glory.

Chris HadfieldHadfield describes in humorous, engaging detail how he first dreamed the astronaut dream, after watching the telecast of Neil Armstrong descending on the Moon: ‘Slowly, methodically, a man descended the leg of a spaceship and carefully stepped onto the surface of the Moon. The image was grainy, but I knew exactly what we were seeing: the impossible, made possible. The room erupted in amazement…Somehow, we felt as if we were up there with Neil Armstrong, changing the world.

‘Later, walking back to our cottage, I looked up at the Moon. It was no longer a distant, unknowable orb but a place where people walked, talked, worked and even slept. At that moment, I knew what I wanted to do with my life. I was going to follow in the footsteps so boldly imprinted just moments before. Roaring around in a rocket, exploring space, pushing the boundaries of knowledge and human capability – I knew, with absolute clarity, that I wanted to be an astronaut.’

It is with the same clarity that Hadfield outlines the agonies and the ecstasies of his journey as a Canadian boy hoping to catch a break into NASA space programme, enrolling in military service to ensure a route to NASA, getting his glider license at age 15, turning down an opportunity to become a commercial airline pilot to focus on being an astronaut instead, getting through to the Canadian Space Agency, and finally, getting the break into NASA. He outlines his journey with insights into daily gruelling schedules, maintaining optimum fitness levels at all times (the slightest disorder or illness can get you off the programme), the relentless training and repeat training of a series of tasks as part of simulator exercises, and working with a team as an equal player who does not seek individual recognition but team success.

His stint as Commander of the International Space Station, however, made Hadfield famous all over the globe – not least because of the live streaming of pictures and videos that he engineered for transmission from the shuttle and the live tweets of important events aboard the spaceship, but for his performance (on guitar and without his spacesuit) of David Bowie’s ‘Space Oddity’, which became an instant hit online.

His book is an insightful look into the travails and joys of being an astronaut – he describes in vivid detail, for instance, about how zero gravity makes everyday, mundane tasks on space oddityEarth, like washing one’s hair or moving from spot to spot, a complete challenge to master. But his story is not just a superstar’s account of life aboard a spaceship and watching over Earth from a thousand miles away; Hadfield details in pitiless detail the amount of repetitive hard work in the course of training, the compulsive drive an astronaut must possess to be a team player, to practice every single task and routine over and over again and to leave nothing to chance when fighting a crisis. As a reader, you can’t help but be inspired, as he explains the mantra of his success, a philosophy he learnt at NASA: ‘Prepare for the worst – and enjoy every moment of it.’

Hadfield writes simply and with humour, bringing to life the incidents where he disposed of a live snake while piloting a plane, or breaking into the Space Station with a Swiss army knife, or even washing his hair with no-rinse shampoo aboard the spaceship. Readers will understand why being an astronaut is one of the toughest jobs in the world – and why all the hard work is worth it with just one glance at beautiful Earth from outer Space.

Rating for ‘An Astronaut’s Guide To Life On Earth’: 4/5. Buy the book at a discount on Flipkart.

Excerpt from the book:

‘Weightlessness doesn’t feel the same on a huge spaceship where you can move around freely as it does on a tiny rocket ship where there’s nowhere to go. Imagine floating in a pool without water, if you can, then endow yourself with a few superpowers: you can move huge objects with the flick of a wrist, hang upside down from the ceiling like a bat, tumble through the air like an Olympic gymnast. You can fly. And all of it is effortless.

But effortlessness takes some getting used to. My body and brain were so accustomed to resisting gravity that when there was no longer anything to resist, I clumsily, sometimes comically, overdid things. Two weeks in, I finally had moments approaching grace, where I made my way through the Station feeling like an ape swinging from vine to vine. But invariably, just as I was marvelling at my own agility, I’d miss a handrail and crash into a wall. It took six weeks until I felt like a true spaceling and movement became almost unconscious; deep in conversation with a crewmate, I’d suddenly realise that we’d drifted clear across a module, much as you might gently bob around in a pool without really noticing.

The absence of gravity alters the texture of daily life because it affects almost everything we do. Toothbrushing, for instance: you need to swallow the toothpaste – spitting is a very bad idea without the force of gravity or any running water to help stuff go down the drain and stay there. Hand washing requires a bag of water that has already been mixed with a bit of no-rinse soap; squirt a bubble of the stuff through a straw, catch it and rub it all over your hands – carefully, so it clings to your fingers like gel instead of breaking into tiny droplets that fly all over the place – then towel dry.’

(Pictures courtesy www.canada.com, www.nbcnews.com, blogs.windsorstar.com)

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Review: ‘Paperback dreams’

Rahul Saini’s newest book is a behind-the-scenes look at the (sometimes) murky world of book publishing and the writing process.
by The Editors | editor@themetrognome.in

Rahul SainiIf you’ve been an aspiring author, a recently-published one, or worse, a rejected one, you must read Rahul Saini’s Paperback Dreams.

The thing with writing a book in India today is that one gets complacent even before one takes up a plot, or a story outline, or even a pen. “So much nonsense is being published every day, I can write better than that,” one says, secure in the ‘knowledge’ that publishers – all publishers – are simply waiting for one to finish their magnum opus so that printing of the book may commence. And when one’s book is out, all one has to do is sit back and rake in the royalties.

That is not so, as Paperback Dreams explains in funny, sharp detail. The book’s three protagonists – published authors Rohit Sehdev and Jeet Obiroi, and aspiring author and school student Karun Mukharjee – are presented in three parallel narratives, but are connected at various points in the story. All three are published by Dash Publishers. Rohit is a bestselling author who is being cheated out of his royalties, but he is initially too afraid to even have strong words with the publisher. Meanwhile, Jeet is cruising along with the success of his first book and his movie star looks, but he is constantly dogged by a dark secret about his book that he hopes nobody will ever find out.

Meanwhile, Karun has cracked the formula for the perfect love story – after a bit of research of best-selling authors’s works, he has finished his debut novel and is due to be published while still in school. However, he hits upon a Machiavellian plan to achieve his ends – not content to merely be published, he wants to ensure that he becomes the star for Dash Publishers as their other best-selling authors fall to the wayside.

Readers will recognise some of India’s spectacular publishing successes that Saini mentions off and on – there are references to Bhetan Chagat, for example. However, Saini’s paperback dreamslight-hearted take on the publishing industry also reveals several dark truths. It’s not all hunky dory in the publishing world – publishers routinely cheat authors of royalties, new authors’s books are not promoted or stocked in bookstores, debutant authors sometimes have to rewrite major plot points to please the publisher, and plagiarism is a common phenomenon. Also, as Saini deftly points out, it is really not that difficult to get published these days.

Overall, the book is an enjoyable read, but you will be a put off by several typos that suddenly appear in a few chapters in the middle of the book. Obviously, somebody’s been sleeping at the editing table. Other than that, you might also think that the Karun narrative is a bit simplistic, even clunky. It’s all okay till he devises his evil plan, but the methods he adopts and the results he gets seem a bit far-fetched.

The most relatable character is Rohit, for his low self-confidence, his obvious talent that he is reluctant to advertise, his constant whining about his problems while lacking the courage to take corrective action. So many of us are like that. How he finally tackles the publisher in a comical denouement would make for a good scene in a film. In fact, we rather suspect Saini wrote this book for celluloid, like a certain Mr Bhagat.

Rating: 3.5/5

Rating scale: 1 = Awful; 2 = Slightly rubbish; 3 = Tolerable read; 4 = Good; 5 = Paisa vasool.

Check out Rahul Saini’s Paperback Dreams here.

(Author photograph courtesy Rahul Saini, featured image www.compassbook.com)

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State of Zen – the new Ultrafone 701 FHD

Zen’s new smartphone, the Ultrafone 701 FHD could do with a few bug fixes for a device at that price.
by Manik Kakra

Zen has been one of those Indian brands that have getting a lot of attention recently. The company launched the Ultrafone 701 HD a few months back, and has now come up with its successor –the Ultrafone 701 FHD. The Ultrafone 701 FHD is an Android 4.2.1 smartphone powered by Mediatek’s MT6589 chipset, along with 1 GB of RAM. Boasting a full HD screen, the phone makes the sub 20k phone range more interesting. Without further ado, let’s start with our review.

Hardware and design

The Ultrafone 701 FHD follows the usual slab design without much added or removed from the picture. As soon as you hold the device, you realise it’s not bulky and fits well in the hand. A glossy back with plastic coating on top, it is probably the only design part which makes the phone different from a lot of slab-styled phones out there. Having matte grey edges, just like its front edges, these are certainly better while holding the device and performing a task with one hand.

The front sports the screen with speaker grill and camera above, and three capacitive buttons – Options, Home and Back – on its bottom. The bezel below the screen is a bit too noticeable, especially considering how much space is left even after providing some for buttons. On the right side, you only have the Power/Lock key. On the left, you have the volume rockers. And the top gets 3.5 mm headset jack along with microUSB port. The back boasts a 13 MP camera, Zen logo in the middle and loudspeakers at the bottom – all black back with a diagonal pattern.

New Zen UltrafoneScreen

Talking about the screen, the phone has a full HD display, which is pretty much its USP. The screen quality is, let’s just say, good. It’s not very bright, but videos mostly look just fine. Colours are not very rich, but a bit washed out, and probably the way you would expect when the company wants to save on some bucks. The resolution seems good when viewing images. And visibility under direct sunlight it also average. I was expecting the screen to be much better, considering how much effort the companies make on them these days.

Camera

The phone sports a 3 MP rear camera that has a Bsi 2 sensor for better photographs under not-so-good light conditions. Here are a few sample images: http://imgur.com/a/cgfZT

The images mostly came out nice and clear. My experience with this camera in low-light conditions wasn’t too good. It was just okay, but in daylight and in general, it’s probably as good as you can get from an Android device priced around Rs 15K, apart from unusual over-sharp images. Just that the stock camera app isn’t the best, and you may well try a few third-party apps to get more out of the camera.

The front facing 8 MP camera is nice, wide angled and really good for your video calling and mirror needs.

Audio

I was very irritated due to the placement of the loudspeakers – right at the bottom on the back. I had missed so many calls and alerts due to sound getting all muffled with the phone New Zen Ultrafoneplaced back side down. Though the sound is actually quite loud and clear, the moment you place the phone down, you wouldn’t hear a single thing. In-ear sound quality is just fine, but I have tried phones with much better sound quality than this, even at this price point.

Call quality wasn’t an issue with the smartphone. I was satisfied with the audio during call, and also didn’t notice any network reception trouble during my usage.

Battery

The phone is equipped with 2.050 mAh battery, and takes more than three hours to get charged, which is a bit too much for a battery cell this size. I usually got about 18 hours of battery life with about four hours screen on time. It’s apparent that the full HD screen takes a toll on the battery life, and the phone could do with a firmware update to get better battery utilisation.

Software and Performance

The Ultrafone 701 FHD runs on Android 4.2.1 with near stock software. You get a few pre-loaded apps like WhatsApp and Saavn, but it is more or less stock Android Jelly Bean. Under the hood, there is a quad-core MT6589 SoC, along with 1 GB of RAM. And here’s the thing: the phone works smoothly when you are using two to three apps and keep exiting each one. But when you are in an app, using it for more than, say, half an hour, you realise that the RAM capacity isn’t enough.

The company says the chipset used here isn’t much optimised for 2 GB of RAM, so that had to put in 1 GB. That was my main issue with the phone’s performance; it will remain smooth but definitely lags and stutters in apps when an app or two are used (on-screen) for a bit. The capacitive keys, when pressed in an app or when using the default keyboard, will show you what I am saying. Smooth initially, but mostly sluggish performance after using for about half an hour.

New Zen UltrafoneThe OS isn’t much different from stock Android and that isn’t really a bad thing. We have been told that the phone will get Android 4.3 update in a month or so, but there is no official word on 4.4. There are five Home screens by default, you can customise the way you need. The App Drawer, Notification Center, all are exactly how we are used to seeing, not much different even from the 701 HD.

All in all, it is clear what Zen is trying here – bring in quad-core devices with full HD screens and offer them in sub 18k range. The 701 HD was a pretty good device for under Rs 13,000, but the 701 FHD could do with a few bug fixes – battery optimisation and general performance – on order to give the Sony and Nokia phones in this range a run for their money.

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Review: BlackBerry Z10

Our tech reviewer tests the new and interesting BlackBerry Z10, and explains some of the fuss behind Blackberry’s newest offering.
by Manik Kakra

BlackBerry has been in a lot of trouble for the last two years or so. Their loyal customers have shifted to iOS and Android, and their financial statement doesn’t look impressive, either.
In an effort to overhaul its whole mobile business, BlackBerry has come up with its new operating system, built again from the ground up, BlackBerry Z10. BlackBerry Z10 is the veritable messiah to take this OS into the market. We take a look at this device and the new OS, and how it differs from the existing players in the market.

What it looks like: The BlackBerry Z10 sports a 4.2-inch (1280×768) screen, and has a rubberised back. The phone feels like a premium piece as soon as you hold it, and fits in your hand very nicely. There are no cheap materials or colours on its body.

On the right, there are volume rockers and a voice control button in between (see pic on left); the left side has an HDMI port and microUSB port. The front is dominated by that screen. On top of the screen, there’s a 2 MP front-facing camera, LED light and speaker + sensor. On the bottom of the screen, you get a bold BlackBerry branding and primary mic. On the back, there is an 8 MP camera with an LED flash, and BB logo in the middle. On the phone’s top, there is a 3.5 mm headset jack, Power/ Lock key, and secondary mic. The bottom side has just a loudspeaker.

There are no physical buttons on the front, making it a full-touch device like the Nokia N9.

Screen test: The phone’s screen is quite bright and colours look very vibrant on it. There is not much chance you would see any pixels, and usually videos look impressive on it. The buttons on the side are also of high quality – you get a good feedback on pressing them. BlackBerry has done well in the construction of the phone as there are no rough edges. The call quality and network reception on the device we tested were top notch.

Camera quality: The 8 MP camera isn’t something extraordinary. It performs well in daylight conditions but the images aren’t the best from among the high-end smartphones out there. Although the lowlight images were really bad, most of the images in natural light should satisfy an average smartphone user. The focus works quite well, too. You can either tap on the screen to take a picture, or press the volume up button.

The camera UI is quite interesting. BlackBerry has overhauled it and made it quite convenient for the user to change settings within camera like TimeShift (burst mode), and frames.
Hear this: The audio quality on the phone through loudspeakers was disappointing. You get distorted sound even when playing on 70 per cent volume, and the loudspeakers, at the bottom, may get muffled while using the phone. Having said that, the in-ear sound was noticeably better. It was loud, clear, and the basic earphones, though no match for dedicated audio earphones, seem good.

Battery life: Battery life on the phone was average. I was able to get 16 hours on a single charge with regular usage.

Software brouhaha: Let’s now talk about the software – BlackBerry Z10. The software is nothing what we have seen from the company earlier. The BB10 OS is based on full-touch interface. The outlay is quite interesting. As soon as you switch on the phone, you get to see the Menu (or App tray). By swiping left from the first menu screen, you go to Hub, and swiping right takes you to other Menu screens.

Hub, as the name suggests, is one-stop umbrella for all your messages – Email, Twitter mentions, BBM, and SMS. You get all of them neatly placed in the Hub. Whenever there’s a new message, the LED notification light starts blinking, just like in the older BB devices. When you go into an app from the Menu, you have to swipe up from the bottom of the screen (ahem, webOS) to come out of the screen, and you will get to see multitasking view, showing you all the opened apps. All these preview panes have a small close ‘X’ button in order to close as well as remove the app from the multitasking page.

At the end of it all: The phone performs really well, and the UI is very fluid and quite intuitive to use. With its 1.5 GHz dual-core S4 Pro processor, and 2 GB of RAM, the phone almost never lagged and performed smoothly. The app switching works brilliantly and there were no app crashes.

Talking of apps, the BB AppWorld is seriously a downside to the OS. Though there are nearly 1 lakh apps available, there are too less good quality, important apps. BlackBerry has tried to give several native apps – Twitter, Facebook, FourSquare, Dropbox – but most seem half-baked. Take Twitter for instance; there’s no way to change font size, you cannot remain on your timeline position, and so on.

Email, which has been a strong point for BlackBerry, remains a solid point. The Email experience is one of the best you could get. That, along with the keyboard, are the best things about this OS. The keyboard is quite different from what we have seen on touchscreens, but once you start using it, you realise how nicely it works and how the prediction gets better. The Web browser is also very nice, and loads pages without showing too many weak links.
The OS doesn’t bring something new to the table for users which iOS or Android don’t already have. Yes, the gesture-based UI is good, but it could mean a new user has to learn how to use his new BlackBerry phone.

It is clear that BlackBerry has made a serious effort in the past one year. The BB Z10 is a really nice phone, but it may well be a little too less for users who are already used to iOS, Android, or Windows Phones. Having said that, if BlackBerry keeps providing updates and brings the Q10 to the market quickly, it could mean better time for BlackBerry in the Indian market.

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‘Stop looking for love’

Rupa Gulab speaks about her latest book, why she prefers writing short stories and about telling it like it is.
by Vrushali Lad | vrushali@themetrognome.in

That Rupa Gulab is a very good writer is stating the obvious. The writer of three books – Girl Alone, Chip Of The Old Blockhead and The Great Depression Of The 40s: A Novel, and a columnist with a flair for the comic touch, Rupa is a revelation with her newest book, I Kissed A Frog.

In an interview with The Metrognome, the author talks about writing on love and friendship, how her most poignant tale in this story is an ode to her best friend, and why one must stop looking for love and let it come when it has to.

Why a book of irreverent short stories on love?

Why not? I enjoy telling it like it is! I must say that with I Kissed A Frog I discovered that writing short stories is so much more fun than writing a novel. You have so many different characters and situations to play with – it’s great entertainment for a writer. But I’d just like to point out that this book is not merely about love – friendship plays a huge role here. And friendship (to me) is just as important as love. I pointed that out in ‘Hell’s Angel’ (one of the stories in the book), where the heroine is gutted when her best friend moves to New York.

You mention in the book that some of the stories were published earlier in magazines and websites, and that you made changes to them before they went into I Kissed A Frog. What is it like, re-visiting something that is written and published?

What can I say? I get bored rather quickly. My first novel, Girl Alone, was based on a column called Dating Diary that ran in Cosmopolitan for two years. When I decided to adapt it to a novel, I made many changes. Like, for example, in the column whenever Arti (the heroine) goes through a spot of trauma, she glugs antacids. In the novel, I changed it to cough syrup because that gives it a more dangerous dimension. I have to refresh things to keep myself interested. Then there’s so much more freedom when you’re writing a book. You can use swear words liberally without worrying about nasty letters being sent to an editor. And there’s no word count limitation – you can write as much as you want.

That’s why I made a few changes to six of the stories in I Kissed A Frog that were published earlier in mags and websites.

Are any of the stories in I Kissed A Frog autobiographical?

Not at all. Girl Alone was the only novel in which I let a part of myself show.

Of all the stories in the book, ‘Au Revoir’ stands out for its very different tone. In fact, I was startled by how searing this particular story was, not what I was expecting after such funny ones as ‘Diet Wars’. What inspired this particular story?

When I was writing stories for the Friendship Diaries section of I Kissed A Frog, I decided to put in one about my best friend, Ranjona Banerji, too. See, Ranjona and I have always joked about the fact that she will outlive me because of my lousy lifestyle choices. Which means she’d be the person to contribute to my obituary, and I’d be off the hook for her obit, right?

So I decided to write her obit in advance – Au Revoir is just that. It’s a tribute to our long friendship that goes back to school days. Not surprisingly, the emotions flowed naturally, and dark humour set the tone. I sent her a cryptic text message while I was writing it, saying that I had just murdered her.  As far as I’m concerned, my job is done. And she owes me an obit, and I want it now! Hell, I’m longing to read nice things about myself before I die.

Have any of your family and friends featured as characters in any of the stories?

While there are shades of some members of my family (including my husband) in my earlier novels, I Kissed A Frog is free of family-based characters. And I bet they’re all heaving a sigh of relief! This book really is about different kinds of love and a celebration of friendship. And, as I mentioned before, the story ‘Au Revoir’ is based on and for my best friend.

Of all the stories, which one is your favourite? Why?

I have three favourites: ‘The Ex-Files’, ‘Au Revoir’ and ‘Rapper N. Zel’. I enjoyed writing ‘The Ex-Files’ because of the gradual changes in the heroine’s prickly relationship with her mother after she got dumped – exploring relationships is my thing! I loved writing ‘Rapper N. Zel’ because it’s all about how women have to struggle to break the glass ceiling and how bitter they become because of it – and in my mind, this story is dedicated to all my friends who’ve faced that problem. And as for ‘Au Revoir’, I’ve already told you why it’s special for me.

Of all the stories, which one is most likely to have played out in your own life?

Oh, ‘Hell’s Angel’ – definitely! I worked in the media (as a copywriter in advertising) for many years. The heroine’s lifestyle could have been mine.

What is the nicest compliment you’ve received for ‘I Kissed A Frog

A review by a male blogger who started out by saying how much he disliked chick lit, and ended up saying that I Kissed A Frog changed his mind about the genre. I seriously love this guy! (Read his review here)

What is your honest opinion on love and the various ways we go about looking for it? 

I’d say stop looking for it! Don’t waste your time. It will come when it has to. And if it doesn’t come, who cares? Look, you have friends you can rely on for companionship, FB and Twitter are great interaction spaces, and then you have work, books, music and movies to lose yourself in. Life’s crowded enough already. When I was in college, I’d put up a lovely paragraph from DH Lawrence’s Lady Chatterley’s Lover on my bedroom wall. It says everything I believe about love. Here goes:

“It’s no good trying to get rid of your own aloneness. You’ve got to stick to it all your life. Only at times, at times, the gap will be filled in. At times! But you have to wait for the times.”

Not surprisingly, I put this quote in Girl Alone as well!

On the subject of your sister Kushalrani (aka Bunny), who you say is a ‘horror, and your worst critic’, how has having a writer sibling helped you when you write?

Well, most writers always show their first draft to family and/or close friends. I have a small core group: my sisters Roma Circar and Kushalrani Gulab (aka Bunny), my husband Salil Sadanandan and my friend Ranjona Banerji. The reason why I chose them is because we share the same sense of humour and irony. Incidentally, all of them are writers. While my husband is not a full time writer (he was cruelly shoved on the IIT, IIM path by his parents) he occasionally writes on eclectic subjects (humour, design and travel) for various publications.

When I share my first draft with them, my brief is very stern: “Do not waste my precious time by telling me what you like about it. Tell me what you hate about it. Be savage, rip it to shreds!” I must say that this is the only time they ever listen to me. I grade them on the ‘savagery’ index:

Roma is the gentlest of the lot. When she doesn’t like something, she informs me firmly but apologetically, starting her sentences with nervous “umms.”

Ranjona is tougher. No “umms” for her. It’s always a grim “hmm” which is followed by a bald statement. Our biggest arguments are over the placement of commas. We both have strong views on the subject.

Bunny and Salil are the most frightening – and frankly, I don’t know which one is worse. Let me start with Bunny. When she goes through my draft she ruthlessly deletes sentences/paragraphs that she believes interfere with the flow of the story, ignoring my howls of anguish. Hell, some of my funniest jokes have been killed by her and she’s always unrepentant. “The story comes first,” is her heartless mantra.

Clichés are bigger sins than murder according to her, and my God, if she happens to spot something like “as white as snow”, she hisses menacingly and explodes like an angry pressure cooker. I have, however, sneakily slipped in an “over the moon” in one of the stories in I Kissed A Frog. An act of defiance, just to prove to her that I have a backbone!

If Bunny does the pressure-cooker-exploding act to frightening perfection, Salil is like one of those raging Pamplona bulls you really don’t want to cross paths with. He gets furious, absolutely livid, if he comes across bits he doesn’t like. I am ordered (yes, ordered!) to rewrite bits of stories, change a character’s profession, change a tone of voice, et cetera. And though I’m complaining bitterly, I have to confess that his feedback on the draft of I Kissed A Frog was marvellous. Bunny’s softer when it comes to rewrites. She merely offers suggestions that I am free to ignore.

At the end of it all, I’m a quivering mess and I go with my gut. Sometimes I give in, sometimes I don’t. But I’m always thankful for the advice from all four of them because they are the critics I respect most.

What is the kind of writing you are most drawn to? Who are your favourite authors?

I grew up in a house that had more books than furniture because my parents were voracious readers. Humour was their preference and we had practically every single book written by PG Wodehouse, Richmal Compton, Anthony Buckeridge, Lewis Carroll, etc. As I grew older, I added a few more humour writers to my personal book shelves: Woody Allen, James Thurber, George Mikes, Richard Armour and Gerald Durrell, to name a few. At the same time, I have to confess that I sighed deeply over Gaston Leroux’s The Phantom Of The Opera, William Saroyan’s beautifully brilliant The Human Comedy, Richard Llewellyn’s How Green Was My Valley (my dad’s favourite book), most of DH Lawrence, some of Thomas Hardy and other  books that do not fall into the humour category. And as for the girlie moments, I still fall back on my mum’s favourites: Jane Austen, Georgette Heyer and Jean Webster who wrote my absolutely favourite growing up book Daddy Long-legs. Oh, and I have finally learnt to appreciate Charles Dickens! My parents loved him so, and they were shocked that I hated his books when I was in school and college.

What are you working on next?

I can’t say yet. I’ve got two novels for drastically different target audiences in mind, but I really have no idea if and when I’ll get down to it. I’m not a disciplined writer anymore.  Take I Kissed A Frog. I suddenly decided to write it in April last year and finished it in three months flat. I’m pretty much worn out after that frenetic burst of activity.

Lastly, if you had to change the endings for any of these stories, which ones would you choose and how would you change them?

I wouldn’t change them at all.

 _________________________

About the book:

I Kissed A Frog is a collection of not-so-perfect love stories, dealing as they are with ex-boyfriends, current boyfriends hooking up with best friends, aiming for a man who doesn’t love one when another who does is right in front of one, friends and colleagues engaged in diet wars, and in a really funny vein, love and relationships through popular fairy tales set in contemporary times.

I particularly liked ‘Love in F Major’, where a girl starts seeing a married man and hopes he will make the ultimate choice, ‘Welcome to the Sisterhood’, which discusses sex change, ‘Wannabe mum’, in which a woman’s biological clock decides the course of her stable relationship, ‘Au revoir’, in which a dying girl says goodbye to her best friend, and all of the ‘Not-so-grim fairy tales for big, bad girls’.

Rupa keeps the tone conversational and sometimes flippant, bringing in different dimensions to love, romance, inter-office rivalry, personal insecurities, and of course, friendship. This is a book to be read by all women – those who have a gang of girls to hang out with, those who slink off home after work to watch TV and eat ice cream straight from the container, those who wonder why their mothers and best friends oppose everything they say and do, and especially those who feel that the world ended with their one great romance.

In fact, the book stands the very real danger of being picked up only by women – and all the stories are written from a woman’s perspective. Maybe Rupa’s next book of short stories could be about what men want.

Send us a love story to editor@themetrognome.in, and you could win a copy of Rupa Gulab’s I Kissed A Frog

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