Category: Columns

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Overdose

The monkey and the cell phone

Jatin Sharma writes on the phone-picture trend that makes us tell the world ‘I was there’ even during a tragedy.

As a child, I heard my mother use this phrase a million times: “Bandar ke haath mein astara.” I always used to wonder how this line could apply in real life. How could someone be compared to a monkey, and how could a little astara in a monkey’s hand seem so wrong? My questions were answered 20 years later, more specifically, with the unfortunate demise of Balasaheb Thackeray.

I’m not debating the most controversial man of our political times. Certain ‘comics’ have joked about him after his death, pundits have spoken about his divisive politics, the layman has spoken about how his entertainment channels were blacked out. Balasaheb’s  funeral became the biggest news in the country and everyone in India was glued to their television sets.

But that is not my point. My point is about how indisciplined and insensitive we have become. I assume that everyone who came to Shivaji park came there because they wanted to pay their last respects to the ekta tiger. But I was amused and amazed by the insensitivity that we have started showing as a culture. In the aforementioned phrase, the astara is the cellphone we carry with us everywhere.

Most of those who attended the funeral were more interested in capturing the moment on their phone cameras, rather than just experiencing it live, quietly. Whenever a news camera passed through crowd, the sight of flashlights and video shooting by every person was evident of how the new age astara has turned everything into a big tamasha. Whether it’s a birthday party or a funeral, people have stopped segregating things in their minds. All they want is one big photo to show ‘I was there.’

Of course, a lot of people would want a picture as a memoir of their leader. But it’s not just about this particular incident, it’s about cell phones as a whole. People are more interesting in shooting videos than cherishing or taking note of their historic presence there. All they think about is capturing their daily lives in a few megapixels, without attaching importance to them being there in person. The things that they could have seen with their very eyes are being looked at through cameras to show the world later.

Their presence at the very spot is reduced to nothing, because they are watching that particular event through a glass that throws some electrons on a cathode ray tube or lights up some pixels.

And what is more stupid is when people take the very cell phones and click and video-shoot themselves at such events and smile and caption the pics as ‘At Balasaheb’s funeral, what great fun it was’.

When I die, my last wish would be that no one should carry a cell phone to my funeral – I would take it very personally if somebody was mocking me after I was dead. I would even haunt them later for doing it. But for now, let me just keep aside this astara and get on with celebrating my life in person.

Jatin Sharma is a media professional who doesn’t want to grow up, because if he grows up he will be like everybody else.

(Picture courtesy www.visualphotos.com)

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Enough said

Did Modi really develop Gujarat?

Humra Quraishi writes on a few startling findings that point to mishandling of funds and incompetence from the Modi government.

Correct me if I am wrong, but even the angrez didn’t indulge in the multiple divide and rule  strategies that are being used in our country today, by those in positions of governance. No  rebellion, big or small, is being allowed to take place, as counter-punches are rapidly thrown in as hurdles. No heated discussions are taking off as the Rakhi Sawants of the world are dragged  in as distractions in all forms and sizes. Naturally, no headways are made in important cases as other skeletons tumble out…

I’m not sure who is supporting whom and why, and why not. But one thing is becoming clearer as each day passes – there seems to be a rather systematic build up to get Narendra Modi to the    centre stage, right here at the Centre. May be even a foreign hand is lending hidden support to these efforts, considering that Modi has begun to get welcoming nods from several foreign  quarters to come and visit. Obviously, no quarter, foreign or otherwise, functions without bigger vested interests in the background.

Apart from wondering what will happen to the country if Modi is brought at the Centre, I am also wondering what will happen to those who are still labouring under illusions of development that are now synonymous with Modi. As the electioneering mood picks up in Gujarat, some  hard facts are spilling out in earnest.

To quote Ahmedabad-based Jesuit, Father Cedric Prakash,  who has worked hard to unearth facts and figures related to Modi’s purported development works, “Modi’s talks on ‘cost  of  development’ deserves scrutiny. The ruling party is burdening the State Exchequer with liability of crores of rupees every day. Even through the RTI route, it is difficult to arrive at the total of wasteful expenditure. The State’s debt as on 31st August 2011 was Rs 1,13,939 crore.

“As per the Report of the Directorate of Economics and Statistics for the 2011, per capita income of Gujarat is Rs 63,961, the average poverty alleviation rate for the country as a whole is 1.5 per cent per year whereas it is 1.7 per cent in case of Gujarat. The percentage of poor people in the State is 23 which, speaks volumes about the state’s development model.

“Again, only 43 per cent of households get water at their doorstep in rural areas, only 16.7 per cent villagers get clean water, 67 per cent of village families do not have toilet facilities, 30 per cent villagers are faced with malarial fever in epidemic proportion, and Gujarat ranks No 14 as regards infant mortality rate. In short, after all its talks on development, Gujarat has been able to achieve a 48 per cent target as far as Human Development Indices are concerned.”

Father Cedric also quotes the CAG Report on Gujarat for 2011. “In this report, there are many startling details about corruption, mal-administration, clumsy and faulty administration, improper and imprudent misuse of Government funds etc. This report was tabled in the Assembly only at the last moment and that too after intervention of the Governor. No scope was left at all for debating the report in the State assembly,” he alleges. He offers these facts from the CAG report as well: funds earmarked for education of dalits were not fully spent for over three years, the Government purchased gas at higher prices and then sold it to Adani and Essar at cheaper prices, irregularities of Rs 1,100 crore are believed to have taken place in Sujalam Sufalam schemes, State’s revenue deficit in the year 2008-09 was Rs 10,438 crore and Rs 15,074 crore in the year 2010-11.

Father Cedric also addresses this major finding: the Gujarat State Petroleum Company Ltd. (GSPCL) in collaboration with Canada’s Global Resources Company ventured into business of drilling petroleum from the Krishna – Godavari basin. In this partnership, the Canadian Company had no share in the losses of GSPCL. Drilling in K-G Basin was a failure. Yet, the CM created a media hype by riding a helicopter to the drilling rig. Though the entire effort incurred huge loss, the Canadian company was given a ‘share in profit’, which never existed. “Thus, poor taxpayer of the State was looted and a foreign company was handed over a huge bounty. It is believed that in this entire process, scam of over Rs 5,000 crore had taken place. The Government, which boasts of being No. 1, has shown total lack of finance management.”

By the end of the year 2000, he says, “There were 3,000 large scale industrial units. At the end of 2010, the number has increased to 9,000. Substantial amounts of government money is spent for setting up the CETP and in spite of not getting desired outcome, no care or caution is exercised in adding new and more industries. This type of industrialisation will cause huge damage to the environment to which the Government turns a Nelson’s eye.”

Humra Quraishi is a veteran journalist and author of Kashmir: The Untold Story and co-author of Absolute Khushwant. 

Categories
M

Don’t judge a film by its promo

M writes about how film promos these days are different from the storyline, and tagged to the last Bollywood hit.

Once, in a fit of momentary madness, I decided to watch Aiyyaa on DTH. Suffice it to say that I should have been paid to watch that film, even if I did watch it at home.

Apart from being an utter and complete waste of time that I could have employed in other pursuits, I was annoyed at how the film kept drifting from the main plot every five minutes. But my disappointment was not with the film itself, or its actors. It was the way the film was promoted. The promos led me to believe that it was the story of a small town girl and her romantic escapades. Shots of two very sleazy songs in the film constantly reminded the audience of The Dirty Picture. With such a preamble, naturally the audience expected much more masala in the actual film. Instead, when you watch the film you realise that it is actually the innocent love story of an extroverted girl and a devil-may-care guy.

Marketing a film is as critical as the creative aspects of making one. The marketing peg can bring or take the audience away from the theatres. Unlike a brand, marketing a film is different. While launching a new product in the market, the brand custodians will work on solid background data and create campaigns around the footprints of their Target Audience (TA). But a film is assumed to work for the entire mass. Cinema, being a mass medium, garners interest across gender, ethnicity, age, etcl. But in Bollywood, it seems minimal efforts are spent on a film’s strategy and the sole objective is to play on the last successful film; in case of Aiyyaa it was The Dirty Picture.

There are many films that have gone wrong with their marketing, and many ‘brilliant’ ideas have also mercifully been rejected in the board rooms. One such spin-off attempt happened not very long ago. The film was a rundown romance spread across three generations, with all three pairs being played by the same lead actors. Clearly, there was nothing to go on in terms of the storyline, so the fallout plan was to create hype around the stars of the film.

So the usual gimmicky stories were prepared for release in the media – like the off-screen romance brewing between the actors, the petty fights on the sets, etc. But one of the film’s producers came up with a peculiar idea. The idea, according to him, was a two-edged sword – if implemented, it would promote the film and dilute Salman Khan’s fan following. The truth is that any producer who has not worked with Salman has tried, at least once in his life, to sabotage the actor’s staggering popularity by one means or another. So far, in vain.

So, the big idea was to play on the fact that the lead actor’s mother was of the Muslim faith. Hence, just before release, the actor would visit a famous shrine of a Muslim saint in the city and the same would be projected as the actor’s efforts towards reconciling with his Muslim mother – this would impress and sway the Muslim audiences towards this actor. Let me mention, as an aside, that Muslim audiences are seen as Salman’s key fan base.

But in reality, the lead actor of this film was a staunch follower of the Hindu spiritual guru Sri Sri Ravi Shankar. This idea had to be shot down by the other producers.

There are many recent films that have been presented differently in their promos than what the actual script is. Jism 2 and Ishaqzaade are two films that firmly fall under this category, but don’t go checking them out. With lack of good storylines, I suppose filmmakers must do whatever they can to get their films some attention; be it projecting a film untrue to its plot, adding tons of sleaze or even recreating celebrity personas that do not actually exist.

Sharp as a tack and sitting on more hot scoops than she knows what to do with, M is a media professional with an eye on entertainment.

(Pictures courtesy www.ibnlive.com)

Categories
Overdose

Happy Diwali in text and spirit

How about ditching that SMS you were about to send and actually calling your friends and relatives to wish them?
By Jatin Sharma

This Diwali, I want to be helpful to you guys. So I’m going to start this piece with a question that everyone must be thinking of by now: How do I wish everyone ‘Happy Diwali’?

For starters, go to your phone’s message field. Type ‘Happy Diwali’, select ‘Send all’ and click. Congratulations, you have managed to wish everyone that is in your phone book!

But have you actually managed to wish someone, or have you just completed a formality? The formality of being in touch, of wishing them on Diwali. Do you really think that that person has taken note of your wishes? Do you really think that person felt wanted this Diwali?

My father once told me, that the more modes of communication in the future, the less people will communicate with each other. Listening to him at that time, I confess, I told my father that he was wrong. Technology would just make life simpler, you could connect with anyone and everyone at any given time. I asked my father, “You must have lost so many of your friends because of less modes of communication. I am in touch with all my friends through SMS and Orkut.” My father said, “It’s just that communication, my son, is not about fake emotions and text. It’s about feeling a touch, listening to a voice, looking at an expression. But I guess I am too old!”

Every time that I receive a forwarded text message now, I remember this conversation. It reminds me of him being so right. We had this conversation when mobile phones used to come in TV remote control sizes, when outgoing call rates were Rs 18 and incoming rates were Rs 16. It was the onset of the generation that was going to take SMS packs and wish everyone in the future.

Though text messages are made of words, somehow I feel they don’t reflect the same emotion. Special days, like festivals, are about the excitement we see around us. It’s more about a shrill voice screaming ‘Happy Diwali’ at us, not a redundant text message that has been sent to millions like us. It’s about coming together, not texting together.

Celebrate this Diwali by calling up your friends and relatives. Make them feel important. Make yourself feel important about having so many people to love in your life. Create a world that is more expressive, not one where a few words that can be deleted by the press of a button on a gadget. Make this Diwali a memorable one.

And I am sorry, but I can wish all of you only in text for now. Wish you a HAPPY DIWALI 🙂

Jatin Sharma, 26, is a media professional who doesn’t want to grow up, because he feels that if he grows up, he will be like everybody else.

 (Picture courtesy www.acne-tv.com)

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Enough said

Naipaul and the overbearing wife

Humra Quraishi writes about her feelings about Girish Karnad’s recent tirade against VS Naipaul, and of the overprotective Mrs Naipaul.

When I heard about playwright and actor Girish Karnad’s tirade against writer VS Naipaul, I was a little amused, and I must admit, a little happy that somebody had finally spoken out so vehemently against him. But more on that later.

I first met Naipaul and his wife Nadira at Khushwant Singh’s home a few years ago. What had immediately struck me within minutes of the meeting, was the lady at the writer’s side. Nadira seemed to exercise total control over her husband, as though some severe insecurity was sapping her, making her hover over him constantly. She seemed overpowering, almost posing a  hurdle to any conversation between her famous husband and me.

And this pattern was repeated every time we met in subsequent years. When I next met them in around 2004, Naipaul had recently done the unthinkable – at least, unthinkable to the sane and  sound of mind in this country. From some semi-political platform, he had given a clean chit of  sorts to the destruction of the Babri Masjid. A Lord giving his approval to destruction! I was astounded.

And so I was dying to throw some unsettling questions at him when we met right after his famous pronouncement, but once again, Nadira swooped in and started hovering around. No sooner had I sat on the chair placed next to him, than she took hold of another chair and sat down on his other side. Though the host for the meeting tried to seat her elsewhere, she shook her head stubbornly and immediately put on a mothering act; serving daal and fried bhindi into a bowl together with salad and curd on his plate, she repeatedly kept asking him whether he wanted this or that.

As she got up to fetch a drink, I’d started the conversation with him, commenting on how little he was eating. “After a certain age, one shouldn’t eat much. I have begun to eat little,” he  said, sounding a little depressed.

“And what are you writing these days?” I asked.

“Nothing, really…after a certain age it gets difficult to write.”

“But isn’t writing an ongoing exercise?”

“No, it gets difficult to write after a certain age. I suppose if I was doing business, I would have carried on, but with writing it isn’t easy.”

“Are you planning to switch over to politics? I ask because you aired, rather too blatantly, some Right wing views recently?”

“No, no politics.”

“But didn’t you travel to Nashik?” I went on. “And it is said that your longish stay at the Maurya Sheraton’s luxury suite was sponsored by a certain political party?”

“Yes, I did travel to Nashik…and here in New Delhi, I did go to the  BJP office headquarters. What’s wrong if a writer goes to a political party’s office and interacts with their workers and leaders?” he spluttered.

I asked my next question. “Shouldn’t a writer not support blatant destruction? Of structures, human or otherwise?”

He’d looked rattled, cornered. And as if out of force of habit, he started looking around for an escape route, somebody to pamper and protect him from fresh onslaughts. And the escape route appeared just then – Nadira was back and seated in the chair she had briefly vacated. Any further queries directed at Naipaul were then answered by the ‘Back off’ look on her face.

He couldn’t answer any more questions, giving in completely to her ministrations with a lopsided smile. I stared with amazement as she overstretched herself, putting up a big show of protecting her husband in a laughably pretentious way.

But where was Nadira last week? It seems she couldn’t protect her husband from Girish  Karnad’s speech, that was aimed at exposing that jaundiced-against-certain-communities streak in most of Naipaul’s works. I confess that I was quietly elated with the incident – it was about time that someone ripped off the hypocrisy hovering around Naipaul and the heavily-biased views that he craftily weaves into his writings.

Humra Quraishi is a veteran journalist and author of Kashmir: The Untold Story and co-author of Absolute Khushwant. 

(Picture courtesy www.outlook.com)

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Patrakar types

The Internet as therapist

Why are we increasingly seeking validation for our actions from strangers online? Whatever happened to dealing with personal crises, personally?
by Vrushali Lad | vrushali@themetrognome.in

Early this week, Twitter users in Mumbai were outraged and astounded by the story of a Mumbai-based writer who blogged about physical abuse at the hands of her boyfriend. The post went viral in minutes, and several Twitter users rallied around the girl and heaped suitable abuse and condemnation on the perpetrator of the beatings, punchings and head-on-wall slammings that the girl said she had been subjected to. For five days, the story played out on Twitter over and over again, with almost all the junta saluting the girl’s courage for speaking out against abuse, and several more promising support and help.

She did not go to the police for personal reasons.  Meanwhile, the boyfriend suspended his Facebook account and went silent on Twitter. There were a few who felt that the matter should not have been aired on a public platform like Twitter at all – that it was a matter to be solved between two adults, privately. Those who expressed this opinion were quickly attacked by the outraged majority, with such analogies as, ‘That is like saying murder should be solved between the murderer and the victim’.

A friend of mine was telling me about a woman she barely knows, who uploads a new picture of herself every day on Facebook, and who recently took an opinion poll on whether her FB ‘friends’ would like to see pictures of her actually giving birth to her son. My friend and I took respective mini Twitter and Facebook sanyaas with these goings-on, moving on to solving our little crises on our own, without a lot of strangers looking in and offering support and encouragement.

It’s not like I don’t want support, it’s just that I don’t need it from a bunch of people I don’t know.

I’m not trivialising anybody’s crises, least of all domestic abuse – it is a sad evil that must be spoken against and more importantly, acted upon – and I’m not getting into the whole ‘Haw! How can he beat?’ debate either. I actually couldn’t care less because I don’t know either the beater or the beatee. Yes, the issue bothers me, just like paedophilia and marital rape bother me. But I am surprised that we are increasingly turning to our computer screens for solutions to our problems.

We are buoyed by retweets from perfect strangers. We are excited by glowing reviews of a new pic we just uploaded on FB. It thrills us to know that complete strangers are recommending our blog posts, tweets and status messages to the world. If we break up with our partners, we tell the virtual world about it and wait for commiserations. We even live tweet the births of our babies (and open Twitter accounts for them). And when people we don’t even know write back to us saying, “I know just how you feel…” we are quietly proud of how someone out there ‘gets’ us.

It seems that we are increasingly looking for validation from an unknown mass of people, and what’s more, looking to be liked. Criticism from unknown quarters stings us. The virtual unknown is important to us, sometimes to the exclusion of family and friends. We’re having dinner with our families, but not participating in the discussion happening over our heads because we’re tweeting about what a good time we’re having at our family dinner. We’re out drinking with friends, but we want to offer immediate proof of what a good time we’re having, so we put up pictures of us pulling monkey faces while we show our drink glasses to the camera. Then the next morning, we explain how those pics were not supposed to be uploaded, that we didn’t know what we were doing because we were so drunk, lolz.

It seems to me that while we’re reaching a lot of people today than we used to, we’re actually unloading on the virtual world a bit more than we used to as well. We’re so connected, the lines between personal and private are not lines any more, but mere specks. Everything is up for evaluation – our personal crises, our major and minor tragedies, our trivialities and successes. And though our world view is much wider in scope as well, we’re expecting strangers to agree with us, to hold our hands through our decisions, to tell us what to do.

I don’t know about you, but if I need help, praise or support, I’ll get it from people I know. The Internet is too creepy a therapist.

Vrushali Lad is a freelance journalist who has spent several years pitching story ideas to reluctant editors. Once, she even got hired while doing so.

 

 

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